Dark Nadir Page 3

  Relief flooded through him. He could see to their Link needs without feeling he was neglecting what he saw as his duty. It was good not to be the one with the final responsibility for once. He got to his feet, urging Jo to accompany him.

  * * *

  Giyesh was waiting in the corridor outside. She directed them to a cabin opposite the medic’s office. As the door closed behind them, Rezac relaxed the control he’d been fighting so hard to maintain. Reaching for Jo, he circled her waist with one arm, stroking the dark hair that crowned her head with his other hand. Breathing in her scent, he began to purr as their minds started to merge.

  “Ah, you feel it too,” he whispered in her ear as his tongue gently rasped against her jawline. “After the battle, the need to pair with one you love, to know you are both still alive. Zashou despised that in me.”

  “She’s not a Warrior,” Jo murmured, turning her face so their lips met, her fingers already beginning to unfasten the belt that held his tunic at the waist.

  His tail flicked around her legs, holding them close against his. “You Humans are not so unlike us,” he purred.

  * * *

  With a start and a cry, Kaid woke, Carrie’s name on his lips as he sat bolt upright in bed. He shivered, chilled to the bone despite his sweat-soaked pelt.

  T’Chebbi loomed over him with an extra blanket. “Bad dreams again?” she asked.

  He took it gratefully, wrapping it round his shoulders for the time being. “More,” he said, clenching his teeth to stop them from chattering. He looked around the dimly lit cabin. “Where’s Giyesh?”

  T’Chebbi shrugged. “Maybe still on duty.”

  “I dreamed I was in cryo, and I could sense her there.”

  “Carrie?” T’Chebbi sat down beside him, her nose creasing in worry as she flicked her long gray-brown plait over her shoulder. “That’s not possible. Cryo is a nothingness. Drugs make you sleep first, you don’t even feel the cold. Then you wake, and it’s over.”

  He looked up, catching her gaze with his. “I was somewhere else, T’Chebbi, somewhere deadly cold—and she was there. I usually feel warmth from our crystal, but it’s been cold since we put her in cryo. Until now.” His hand emerged from the blanket, holding out the crystal he always wore. “Feel it.”

  Leaning forward, she touched it gingerly with her fore-finger. With an exclamation of shock, she pulled her hand sharply away.

  He let the crystal fall back within the blanket, smiling wryly. “You felt it—too warm for just my body heat, isn’t it?”

  “You told me Carrie sensed her mother dying in cryo. Is it possible that the Talented stay aware? That they don’t sleep?”

  “Never heard of it happening. It could be a Human trait,” he replied.

  She grunted. “What was the dream?”

  “Only what I told you. Just being in this bitterly cold place and sensing Carrie and her fear. The sooner we get to Tuushu Station, the better. She’s terrified of cryo, T’Chebbi.”

  “She’s safe asleep,” she said, her tone soothing as she touched his face briefly. “Can I get you anything? A hot drink? You should try to sleep again.”

  “Nothing, thank you,” he said automatically, then hesitated. He wasn’t fooling either of them. “Join me. I’d like your company. Who’s on sentry duty in the mess?”

  “Taynar and Kate. Slept long enough in cryo, they said. Tallis is on graveyard shift.”

  “Should have left him on the Hkariyash,” he grumbled, glad to be dealing with more familiar issues as she slipped into the bed beside him. “He’s more trouble than all the others put together. He’s done nothing but complain since he came on board.” Pulling the blanket from his shoulders, he leaned over to drop it on the floor. T’Chebbi snagged it from him.

  “We use this,” she said, spreading it over him. “You feel like you been in cryo. We can manage Tallis. His mind is sickened after what the Valtegans did to him. He needs help more than anything.”

  He lay down, grateful for her warmth and company; it was helping dissipate the frozen images of his nightmare. As his shivering stopped, he could feel her soundless purr.

  “You only had to ask if you wanted to join me,” he said awkwardly. “You have the right—you are my Companion.” He was finding it difficult to cope with his need for her company and the desire for Carrie’s he was walling away.

  “Sleep,” she said, wrapping her arm across his chest and tucking her nose under his chin.

  * * *

  It had come as a shock to Jeran to find himself on Giyesh’s ship, almost as big a shock as it had to her, judging from her expression when they came face-to-face in the landing bay. Later, she’d managed to see him alone for long enough to arrange this meeting in the unused mess on the second deck. Sitting there at the main table, nursing a hot drink, he wondered why he’d come.

  A shadow fell across the table and he looked up to see her standing in the doorway.

  “I hoped you’d be here,” she said, closing the air lock door behind her.

  “I hadn’t expected to see you again,” he said awkwardly.

  “Neither had I.” She joined him at the table, sitting down opposite him. “This is rather embarrassing for both of us.”

  He frowned. “Why? Only you and I know what happened that night.”

  Giyesh looked away. “Not exactly,” she murmured. “The captain overheard me talking to our medic.”

  “Your medic?”

  “We rescued the young ones, Taynar and Kate,” she said, her voice low. “Mrowbay thought he was an immature male. I told him likely he wasn’t.”

  “You only came to spy on me?” He’d thought there had been more between them than that. A common attraction, a need for company that night at least.

  “No! I came to talk to you, yes, to find out what I could about your people, but the rest . . . That was real.”

  “So all your crew know about us? What did you do? Go into details? Tell them how desperate I was for female company?” he asked angrily.

  “I said nothing to them, I swear I didn’t! Look, I didn’t have to tell you this,” she said defensively. “It was rather obvious that we’d slept with each other when I stayed away all night.”

  “So now it’s my fault for keeping you with me?” He put his cup down with a thump.

  “I didn’t say that,” she said, reaching out to touch his clenched hand. “I stayed with you because I wanted to, because you were so lonely.”

  “I didn’t want your pity then, or now,” he growled, snatching his hand away. “And I didn’t need to be made a figure of fun among your crew. They must be laughing themselves sick every time they see me!”

  “I didn’t mean it that way, Jeran, and they’re not laughing at you,” she said. “You don’t understand. Our ships, we’re all family, all related. It’s me the crew are laughing at, for getting caught by an alien. The captain, my uncle, he’s mad at me!”

  “Caught? How caught?” That surprised him, diverting his anger.

  She shook her head, sending the mane of black hair swaying round her shoulders. “It’s not important,” she said. “But no one’s laughing at you, honestly.”

  “I want to know. You’ve discussed personal matters about me with your medic, and your crew’s laughing at my expense, too, whether you want to admit it or not. You owe me something in return.”

  There was a hunted look in her eyes as she obviously searched for some answer to give him. “I’m of an age where I should have chosen a mate, but I haven’t,” she said finally.

  He narrowed his eyes as he looked at her. She was being less than honest with him, he knew that. Not lying, but near to it. “I’m the first? Is that it?”

  She pushed the chair back, got abruptly to her feet, and headed for the exit. “Forget it, Jeran. It was a mistake meeting with you. I just didn’t want you thinking it was you the crew were laughing at.”

  “Wait!” he said, leaping up to stop her. He caught up with her at the air lock, graspin
g her by the arm. “You’re not leaving without telling me why this is so amusing to your people.”

  “You’re not U’Churian, and not a soldier,” she said.

  “So what?”

  “I told you. I was expected to choose my first partner and didn’t. Instead I asked to see the worlds outside our own, then I’d choose. This is my first mission.”

  She was making no attempt to leave, even though she could probably get free quite easily. Releasing her arm, he reached for her mane of hair, taking hold of a lock that lay on her shoulder. “So why are we here? You didn’t get me to come here just to tell me this.”

  “How would you know?” she countered, then stopped, blue eyes widening. “Unless you’re a telepath?”

  “No, I’m not.” It was a mane, he realized, quite unlike Sholan hair. The night she’d come to him in the warehouse where he was imprisoned on Jalna, they’d talked, then one thing had rapidly led to another. They’d had no expectation of seeing each other again, so hadn’t wasted time on irrelevancies. Matters were slightly different now. She obviously wanted to see him again, or she wouldn’t have suggested this meeting. He stood aside, gesturing to the table. “Stay for a little while. Tell me more about yourself and your people.”

  Warily, she returned to the table, waiting till he sat down. “What do you want to know?”

  “You say you’re all family on this ship. Are you all related, all soldiers?”

  She nodded. “Our unit of the family lives on Home, but the largest one is on the Rryuk itself. We learned long ago during our civil wars that having Family in space meant your name would never die, no matter what happened on Home.”

  He thought about this for a moment. “Who lives on the Rryuk? Just the soldiers?”

  “No, everyone. Children, too. How else could we be self-sustaining?”

  “Space cities,” he murmured, watching her. He’d not realized just how blue her eyes seemed against her dark pelt. They matched her tunic. But then, the only light in the warehouse had come in from the spaceport outside through the small, reinforced window above the door. “How do you stop the inbreeding? We have a clan system similar to yours, but we’re free to bond with those outside our Guild.”

  “Guild?” She wrinkled her nose as she spoke.

  “Professions, like your soldiers.”

  “We can choose from the males on any of the Family’s ships, or even Home itself. There’s not just the Rryuks, but the other lesser families who are allied to us and officially bear our name.”

  “Are you training as a soldier now?”

  She smiled, her sideways grin showing off her white teeth. He remembered her smile because the first time he’d seen it, he’d thought it a warning, as it would have been with his people. “No, I was brought up as one. I began training as soon as I could walk. We females only stay home till we’ve had our first infant, then we go into service on one of the smaller craft till it’s time to breed again, if we wish.”

  Breeding cycles, again very different. “But you chose not to do this.”

  She nodded. “It angered my parents that I didn’t want to enrich the Family before taking service on the Profit, but the elders said I had leave to go if I wished.”

  “And your uncle is one of the old-fashioned types, that’s why he’s angry with you for getting ‘caught’ by me. The others are amused because they’ve been around long enough to see the funny side.”

  She nodded again, setting the silver-colored ring in her right ear swaying.

  “What’s Home like? With all those Families it must be pretty crowded.”

  “Fairly. Lots of cities. When a male marries into the Family, we add a room onto the settlement until there’s no more space, then a group starts up a new settlement. We have a colony world now, and many younger people are setting up there rather than on Home or in space.”

  “You marry for life then.” Her scent was bringing back more memories of their night together. Pairing with her had been like he imagined pairing with a feral would be—from her there’d been no inhibitions, no holding back. Surely she couldn’t mean he was her first lover?

  “No, only for two or three seasons, then we choose again. It makes sure there is always new blood in the Family. What about your people? Do you have only one wife?”

  “No. We take out bonding contracts for either three or five years if we wish to share our cubs,” he said. “Otherwise we have as many lovers as we wish. Our females can choose when they want to have cubs, they don’t have seasons, apart from their first.”

  “Your way is quite different,” she said, her voice trailing off slightly. “Relationships outside our marriages aren’t tolerated.”

  “What about between them, or before?” he asked, sliding across the intervening seat till he was sitting beside her. She wanted him, he could feel it, that’s why she’d suggested they meet here. The attraction between them was pure lust, nothing more—yet.

  “Between is all right,” she said softly, turning to face him as he slid his arm across her shoulders, urging her closer. “But not before. That’s forbidden.”

  “So you and I have broken quite a few rules between us.” His tongue flicked across her cheek while he traced a gentle finger down her throat, continuing over her tunic to her chest. He let his hand linger briefly on her small breasts before moving lower, coming to rest on her hip. Beneath her ship’s uniform, he could feel the braided cord that held up the loincloth she wore. Everything about her excited him, from her exotic alien scent to the long, dark pelt that covered her body.

  “Yes,” she said, but her voice was barely a whisper as she leaned against him. “I’d like to break them again, but not here.”

  “Where then?” he asked, voice rough as he began to lick her ear.

  “Two cabins up from here, there’s an empty guest one. If I go first,” she said, holding his face as her lips touched his, “and you follow in a minute . . . It has a privacy lock.”

  He returned the kiss purposefully, his teeth catching gently at her lip as, reluctantly, he released her. “Go now, before I get too carried away. I won’t be far behind you.”

  * * *

  Father Lijou sat with Guardian Dhaika in the other’s lounge at Vartra’s Retreat. They were drinking c’shar. The years had been kind to the elderly Sholan, he thought, watching the spring afternoon sun catch the reddish glints that still showed in the other’s dark hair and pelt.

  “You seriously believe that it’s Brynne Stevens’ Triad we want, not Kaid’s?”

  Lijou tried to ignore the tone of stark incredulity in Dhaika’s voice. “I do. I’ve thought it since Kaid returned to Stronghold after seeing Vartra here.” He had the satisfaction of seeing the faint gathering of Dhaika’s eye ridges that betrayed his discomfort at being reminded of the incident.

  “That was unexpected. Did Kaid ever say what it was the God wanted?”

  “No, but the change in him was marked. It would appear that in the end, Vartra’s will corresponds to Ghyakulla’s. As I said, I believe Noni is wrong. Brynne Stevens will be the Human bound to our world with his Triad, not Carrie Aldatan.”

  “Brynne’s lack of cooperation over that Derwent character isn’t exactly conducive to trust in such a delicate matter as unity between our species,” murmured Dhaika. “He’s not what I’d call the epitome of a well-adjusted Human within a mixed Leska relationship.”

  “The Gods choose whom They want, Dhaika, you know that. They see into a person’s soul. With all our Talents, that’s beyond us.”

  “I know that.” The slightly acerbic tone was moderated immediately. “So what is it you’re suggesting?”

  Lijou extended the claws on his right hand and gently tapped the arm of his chair. “Noni has a blind spot where Kaid is concerned. She’s letting what she wants to happen blind her to other possibilities. I think it’s time we—pursued—more viable options.”

  “I’m as unhappy with the way she tracks downwind of the Council of Guardians as you ar
e, but to actually work against her. . . .”

  “Not against her,” corrected Lijou. “For Shola, Dhaika. Look at it this way. The Aldatan En’Shalla Triad is the motivating force behind the changes on our world. They’ve had to fight for their freedom, and it’s been hard won. They can’t change what they are, become people of peace, tied into the land, raising cubs. For one, the military won’t let them. We need—Ghyakulla needs—a Triad that will do that. In Vanna Kyjishi and Garras Janagu, we have that. Look at the way they’ve both settled into managing the Clan and estate while Kusac and Carrie are away. Physician Kyjishi’s expecting a second cub, Garras’ this time. And Brynne has calmed down, too. None of those tempestuous relationships with other females any more—in fact, apart from their Link days, he’s been celibate. Not only is he studying how to use his Talent at the Shrine, but since he had that vision from Ghyakulla, he’s become more interested in the religious side. He’s really Brotherhood priestly material, Dhaika. We should encourage this. We’d be fools not to. Think of it as listening to the Goddess rather than as working against Noni.”

  “I hear you, but you haven’t convinced me.”

  Lijou leaned forward and helped himself to one of the tiny savory pastries on the low table in front of him. He knew better; Dhaika would take very little more convincing. He was all but his now. “Shall we agree that if he comes to either of us and asks for further instruction, then it’s a clear sign that Ghyakulla has called him?” He popped the tidbit into his mouth.

  Dhaika regarded him thoughtfully before replying. “If he comes of his own free will, then I will tutor him in the ways of the Goddess, and Her consort, Vartra. You’ve just been newly appointed as a Guardian, Lijou, so understand me well when I say I have no wish to Challenge Noni or the other females on our Council. . . .”

  “Nor have I,” interrupted Lijou. “I’m as aware as you that as two of the only three male Guardians we’re outnumbered before we begin. But I am weary of the fact that in every level of our society there are political factions that serve only to advance their own view of how things should be. Free debate has been stifled for too long. We’ve become trapped in a quagmire of our own making, Dhaika, and we must break free if we’re to keep the superiority we now hold within the Alliance. I can’t help but feel there are desperate times ahead of us.”